Scottish Widows 1 Star 5

Scottish Widows 1 Watt Star 5
Double Hedges
Challenge Cup
Quarter Final

Garry
Cleishy, Robbo, Chiefy, Peas
Jason, Stevie, Mikey, Stewart
Paul, Craig

Sean
Liam


Star showed no mercy to the hapless Widows team as they put them to the sword in a game spoiled by the relentless wind not experienced since Watty fell victim to a particularly vicious Madras.
Referee Millar got his money easily by patroling the centre circle with neither a hand gesture nor, indeed a leg gesture as all of his limbs seemed frozen to his torso leading to confusion whenever a decision had to be reached. But a valuable lesson was learned by the Star chaps. Claim for everything, collect the ball from a throw-in situation and you’ll probably get the decision.
And that’s the last time his name will be mentioned in connection with football apart from a plea to give it up.
Star started brightly against an opponent who had beaten them in an early season match by 3-2 – a result which, given the turn of events on the 14th March was quite incredible. Relegation fodder for sure, but an opponent who had to be defeated for Star to march on in the Challenge Cup.
Star started facilng the wind and the first incident of note came when a ball somehow found itself into the Star penalty box. It took a vicious bounce and Peas reacted like Peter O’Brien (Irish Gymnastic Champion, 1998-2003) to hack the ball to safety.
Stevie (Groucho) Morton started the rout as he sprinted in his Groucho Marx style onto an inch-perfect MacAnulty pass and fluked his finish off a defender for an unfortunate own-goal, although he will be claiming it.
Macca then got into the act with a brace – one with his right foot – a crisp finish which the ‘keeper could only admire as the number 8 (used to be a striker, you know) caught on the sweet spot. His other was equally as good as he hit the ball against the wind with his left, beyond the ‘keeper for a goal which had quality written all over it. Craig Murray’s contribution was instinctively a first-time pass through the Widows’ defence.
Half time came with Cheify - still chubby and his auld man filled with Bovril – a square meal for him. Or is that Oxo cubes
A carnival atmosphere prevailed as the 3-0 lead messed with the players’ minds and the coaches - unconcerned at this temporary lapse in discipline with the only issue in their minds being how soon could we get the two subs on.
But, it has to be said that a good few Star players were actually under-achieving and 4 or 5 were in contention to receive the hook and only positional issues and sub availablity ensured that two starters – no, not soup - never finished.
It was annoying – if understandable – that Star took their foot off the pedal in this second half.
Overall, Star made - and took most of the chances created and the quality of t he goals was of the highest standard with no team in our league capable of stopping any of them. Pity this clinical finishing deserted them last week as they chalked up a rare blank score sheet against Lochend
With the wind at their backs, Star were asked to keep the passes short but could not really cash in on the weather and it was only due to another two quality goals that the score was added to.
Craig made way for Sean and shortly after this Jason made way for Liam. Would have been nice to have them all on the pitch at the same time, but it’s no allowed.
And now – and not in any chronological order, Stevie scored another, probably offside, definitely handled and should have been ‘chalked off – or was that the first goal from this self-proclaimed goal machine - but he did, however establish himself officially as a scoring machine. Is that not a calculator?’
Next Sean scored this goal – and I urge you to read this and drool.
Robbo collected at sweeper and surged forward from deep space nine. Macca made yet another wide run, this time down the left and was found by an inch-perfect pass from the cheeky sweeper. He made hundreds of ground and reached the penalty area area. Support was in abundance as the Star squad moved forward, but Macca found Welsh international Sean Daffid with a pass, which was, in the circumstances, OK.
But – as Peas will testify, the ball in the pen box was liable to bobble and Sean Daffid’s touch was sublime as he tamed the leather sphere and cooly placed the damn thing past the ‘keeper for a brilliant finish to an excellent break-away goal.
The midfield then had a daft, although very entertaining five minutes as Cleishy and Chalky – aka Cleishy and Groucho flicked, backheeled and tricked their way to nowhere in particular, but chairman Peter MacDonald (first mensch in a match report for a while) enjoyed the entertainment. He said: ‘I enjoyed the entertainment.’ Robbo was booked around now for laughing. . .
And then.disaster. Stevie, on half way tried another back-heel which didn’t come orf. (Come on Stevie, there was no way that would ever have found a Star player). The Widows broke quickly, and Robbo had to commit a dodgy tackly in the box. Strangely that phrase seems familiar, but only in his private life. The cheekiest pus in the western world conceded a pen and Star’s clean sheet was in imininent danger – much to the chagrin of a certain Walter Cedric Berwick who was beside himself with rage. Actually he was beside me, but he’s so chubby, he could have been beside most of the residents of Liberton.
The excellent, although untroubled, Garry in goal guessed nearly right but the Widows ruined my day as the clean sheet was sullied.
Performances, not in any particular order;
Garry – no probs, but no threat. Thanks go to him for stepping in to the breach.
Cleishy – tackles 2 or 3 players at a time. Possibly suffering from familiarity in the race for MoM, like Aitchy in that we now expect these performances.
Chiefy- settled into centre-half as though he had been doing that for a while. Robbo – superb defensively, but a frustrated midfielder, I suspect. Peas – dealt with some awkward stuff, played the game with discipline and enthusiasn.
Jason brings stre;ngth and shape to the team – doing the unglamorous stuff willingly. Stevie – has been a revelation since forcing himself ino the team. Still particularly white, though. Mikey – has played with more impact, but still showed his undoubted class. Stewart – flitted in and out of the game and spent an inordinate time on his bum.
Craig – undoubted effort, but he’s a better player than he showed in this match. Paul – back to his goal-scoring best, and recently adding team play to his repertoire.

Sean came on and showed his undoubted skill. While Liam’s presence could only have depressed the opposition as his energy levels are off the scale.
Chris showed commitment (a word strangely missing from some – but not by any means, all) of the Star squad by volunteering to swell the sidelines despite injury and we thank him for this. As we also thank Garry for stepping in.
All in all – a decent performance with the plaudits going to the guys at the sharp end (strikers), the dull end (defenders) and the engine room (Titanic had one of those eh?)
Star have played better and lost, but the quality of the goals in this ‘gripping’ cup tie was superb and as long as we create something for the attacking players to finish, success is not going to be far away.
Sorry, guys, I have to qualify the above with the observsion that the opposition were not particularly good, which is why we committed both of our subs – an unusual tactic, given that we would prefer to keep one in reserve in case of injury.
Obviously.